Andy B's Blog (38)

Well, this has certainly been a crazy start to the New Year, and not what I was expecting. Interesting developments at my workplace - they are making 6 jobs redundant and are replacing them with 5 new ones. My job is one of the 6 and at present I don't think I'll want to apply for one of the 5 replacement jobs - I was about to start looking for new jobs anyway and the new roles at where I work are going to involve some things I don't want to do.

So if I do become redundant, I will…

Not really got a huge amount to say here right now, keeping a lot of stuff limited to Facebook - this year has not got off to the best of starts ,this week being particularly bad and I hope it calms down a bit, issues with landlord and at work, or rather they've had issues with me. Yuck, really hate dealing with these sorts of situations. Other than that things have been okay.

In terms of writing, I am starting to do a bit of poetry again and here is one I started last weekend, it…

I didn't really consciously set it as a New Year intention, but so far I have started to be a bit more social. Joined up with a photography group on Sunday, and have just been to a meditation tonight. That, plus a nice walk on Saturday. Work is a bit better now than it was, hopefully it will continue. Already I feel a bit more connected with people in general and maybe it's what I need to do to be happy again where I live.

Fortunately the slight panic I had with the email my landlord…

I've not had a good start to the New Year, being hammered by my landlord about the state of the house with him saying that work will have to be done which will cost 'a fortune' and that he'll be sure to let me know of the costs. Although there is no way I have done anything sufficient for repairs to cost a fortune, and there are certainly other shared/rented houses I've seen which are in a worse state. Having had a steady start to New Year's Day, this hit me quite hard when I saw the email…

Hey guys,

I think that my goals and intentions are a little different now since I started the 100 Day Challenge back in November. I've had a nice break over the Christmas period, going back to work tomorrow, hopefully this time I will be prepared to face any challenges that may arise although I'm intending to try and adopt a more positive attitude.

Right now, the overriding themes for this year are (a) Loving myself and (b) Going with the flow. I feel that self love could be…

I've had worse years in my life, for sure, but I cannot remember another year quite like this one, where the challenge to change has possibly been greater than in any other year. In hindsight, I probably have grown quite a bit as a person, certainly become more aware of certain things, and also realised how hard I find certain behaviour patterns to change. 

I don't know whether or not I like myself more than I did at the end of last year. In terms of relationships with other…

Just over halfway through the challenge now - have been feeling tense tonight, although a little better now. I am surprised by how much I am missing Facebook, perhaps I need to stop relying on it so much for connecting with others. Still feeling up and down I guess, a bit more down than up. In some ways I wonder whether everything is happening for a reason and maybe there's little I can do to stop it. Life just seems to be going round in circles. 

Things are probably still shifting, I…

Heyyy, 

I'm now staying with my parents for just over a week, for the Christmas period. I am very glad to have a break, and I want to take some time to be quiet and maybe make some plans for next year. I am kind of retreating from the world a bit, staying off Facebook until the New Year, just want to take time to listen to my inner voice and pay attention to what life is saying to me. 

I didn't feel anything too significant on December 21st, but I hope that things will change…

Not long to go now before the Christmas break - can't wait :) Not really got much to post as regards the challenge but I just wanted to share a story from last week where a stranger did a random act of kindness for me. I had to go to the bank to take some work cheques there, as I do once or twice a week. It's in Harrogate town centre and I have to pay for a ticket and display it inside my screen. I got my ticket and put it on top of the area between the steering wheel and the…

Definitely feeling the energy shifts that are going round at the moment. Been really tired tonight, had a bit of a rest and now staying up a bit longer. 

I am going to a meditation on the evening of 12/12/12 and maybe I will get more of an idea of exactly what is going on. These are interesting times though. 

2012 has been a difficult year although I have definitely grown as a person, probably more so than I realise. My goals and intentions for this season have been put on the…

It's been a nice weekend, pretty busy, pretty low key in some ways which suits me, some people involved but not too many, also had the company of two dogs today who were soooooo cute. Yesterday, I was in Durham and met up with my friend Phil, originally from the south coast like me but who now lives in Sunderland, and his wife Caroline. Durham is a nice city but I think it might be nicer to visit in the Spring. Yesterday evening after arriving back home, I went for a meal with my…

Not sure whether I've got my day numbers mixed up but today is definitely Day 37. Been out and have only just got back home so I'll squeeze this entry in whilst I wait for my tea. 

Today was a better day, Friday is always the busiest work day but that can mean I get more focused, and I did quite well. Tonight I went to a meditation where we got taken back into two of our past lives - I have never done this kind of thing before, and it was really. 

The first life I was shown was…

Another challenging day. I need to do a list of the reasons why I don't quit my job so that maybe I get a new perspective on things. 

- The obvious one is that I don't want to be unemployed again. That wasn't much fun. I could then go on to a whole list of consequences of being unemployed but there probably isn't any need. But basically I don't want things to be any worse than they already are. 

- It enables me to have a roof over my head, live in a nice house and pay the rent…

No doubt most if not all of you on here will have heard things said along the lines of 'You must decide what you want. Don't focus on what you don't want' and all that jazz. 

Certainly people say these things when mentioning about relationships. The problem I have though, is KNOWING what I really want, and sometimes it's easier to focus on what I don't want. I came to the realisation about two and a half years ago that I probably didn't want to have children, for various reasons,…

This year is almost over, I can't remember what goals I set at the start of the year, but they've probably mostly been blown out of the window. At the end of the year, when I look back, I'll probably recognise that I've done quite well and have certainly grown as a person. 

This afternoon, I went to Skipton, a market town 15 miles from me which has a good range of shops. There is a New-age shop there which I only discovered last month having been to Skipton a number of times…

I've been slacking a bit with this blog. Oh well, I can forgive myself for that. What's been happening? Interesting week, nothing massively eventful, things are moving along slowly but surely I think, now I'm looking forward to December which sees my birthday and of course Christmas within its timescale. I guess I'm starting to wind down now in preparation for Christmas and the New Year. 

I want to make some changes in the New Year, I don't quite know what they will be yet though,…

The energy is quite intense at the moment with a full moon this week .. just trying my best to ride the wave. Been a tough couple of days, particularly today, with my colleague being on holiday, but thankfully he is back tomorrow. 

I feel also that the angels/universe are wanting to help me resolve a fairly major conflict which has been in my life for the last couple of years .. I don't really want to say what it is, but I think I really need to get in touch with my heart and know…

Been to a workshop where the theme was love .. there was quite an intense but excellent meditation where I did feel some of the pain in my heart, but also I think I managed to open my heart a bit more and release some stuff. My friend did a kind of healing with her singing bowl for all of us and she said what came to her was that next year for me was going to be a fresh start with a move and something related to Earth .. maybe gardening. 

This kind of resonated because I am planning…

Quite a nice day today. Weather hasn't been too bad where I live. I went to Salts Mill, which has a sort of bookshop on the second floor where I checked some personal development and travel related books, and also has a large collection of paintings on the ground floor by the famous English contemporary artist, David Hockney, who is originally from nearby Bradford. I want to re-discover my love for art again. When I was a child, there…

Things have been a lot calmer today and, even though it was a very busy day at work, I didn't get as stressed as I have been doing at times. 

I am still spending too much time on Facebook and not enough in real life. So I've decided to take a break from that until the Mercury retrograde thing is over. I am going to 5 Rhythms tonight and an Angel workshop on Sunday run by my lovely friend Emma. 

I seem to be hearing a lot about 'letting go' recently. For me, letting go means…