A look back on 2012 .. and look forward to 2013

I've had worse years in my life, for sure, but I cannot remember another year quite like this one, where the challenge to change has possibly been greater than in any other year. In hindsight, I probably have grown quite a bit as a person, certainly become more aware of certain things, and also realised how hard I find certain behaviour patterns to change. 

I don't know whether or not I like myself more than I did at the end of last year. In terms of relationships with other people, it has been challenging. As my outlook on life has changed, I have let some friends go, also some friends have moved away. I live in quite an isolating place and the fact that two people I know have also said that Otley is isolating before I mentioned it has definitely backed up that particular view. I am contracted to the room I rent until June 1st but when the contract ends I will not be able to get out of Otley quickly enough, nice place though it may be.  

One definite good thing is that I manifested a car with the help of my parents. I had managed without one for three years but after moving to Otley it became very apparent that a car was going to be beneficial, particularly as the public transport to Harrogate where I work is not good. The car has obviously made it easier to get around and I have been able to visit the beautiful Yorkshire Dales a lot more easily. 

Work was okay up until August but then all hell broke loose, practically. The last few months have probably been the most difficult and stressful times I've known at work. I am hoping things will change in the New Year. My Dad retired this year and my brother got a new job in November having been with the same company for 13 and a half years. 

I have visited places I had not been before, Cornwall was amazing and definitely somewhere I will visit again. 

Hmm, I could say more but probably nothing else really worth saying. I don't have the eager anticipation feelings that can accompany a New Year, which soon evaporate once life gets in the way, I don't know what 2013 will bring but I want to go with the flow and see what happens. Some exciting times for people I know - my Aunt is moving to Malta in the next couple of weeks - she has been renting an apartment there for a while but is now going to live there - having never lived away from her family, it will be quite a change for her but I think it will work out. Also a friend of mine is getting married in May having been single his whole life up until nearly three years ago - he is now I think 46 or 47 - which is fairly cool. 

I think there could be some changes for me this coming year - possibly a move of some sort - my friend Emma said she saw this for me when she was doing a healing. We shall see. I want to increase my confidence so that I will be able to fit in more easily to the New Age movement and the rise of the feminine. At the moment I'm finding things a tiny bit scary - I have big issues with being the odd one out or being left out and being a man in spiritual circles which are populated mainly by women is a bit of a challenge. 

Happy New Year to everyone ;-) 

A