So I found it, the poem, its about dropping the fantasies we were taught or rehearsed in our minds.
About letting go.
About moving in the right direction and being comfortable in our own skins.
FYI many religions, shamans etc believe that the soul lives in our skins. I like that perhaps that is why our skins are constantly renewed, shedding off the old and rengenerating. I think we need to regenerate too. There are many things coming for me, I hope as well for you that I am going to let go of. Things that I drag around like a worn out suitcase (or that lump of cellulite on my bum I can't get rid of LOL) all good things to those who choose to be fabulous. I'm shedding layers. I'm saying goodbye and I'm learning. Learning to be ME without all the BS and the heartache and I'm planting my own garden, with all my favorite flowers and healing herbs including cat nip for the cat to roll around in because I know now that up until this moment everything was a lie, a fairy tale that I chose to float around in and accept and that simply isn't so. I have more power than that and I have enough to extend it to each of you -
To say to you - with every goodbye....
Comes the Dawn
Veronica Shorffstall, 1971
After a while you learn the subtle difference
Between holding a hand and chaining a soul,
And you learn that love doesn't mean leaning
And company doesn't mean security,
And you begin to understand that kisses aren't contracts
And presents aren't promises.
And you begin to accept your defeats
With your head held high and your eyes open,
With the grace of a woman, not the grief of a child.
You learn to build your roads
On today because tomorrow's ground
Is too uncertain for plans, and futures have
A way of falling down in midflight.
After a while you learn that even sunshine
Burns if you get too much.
So you plant your own garden and decorate
Your own soul, instead of waiting
For someone to bring you flowers.
And you learn that you can really endure,
That you really are strong
And you really do have worth
And you learn and learn ... and you learn
With every goodbye you learn.