D8, S1: giving

Hey everybody, finishing up day 8. I had a long day of studying...very long.

Did homework earlier in the day and then went to class and then studied with a group from about 430ish to almost 1100 for my final Wed. I was not going to post a blog today, one b/c I'm tired and ready for bed, two b/c I didn't feel as though there was anything about my day worth sharing.

But, after listening to Marianne Williamson on the way home (on Oprah xm) from school, I decided I should at least do a short one. She was talking about the idea that the course in miracles is based on change of perception from fear to love. She explained that we are often asking God what do you want me to do?...but said we should instead ask...who do you want me to be?

I know my thoughts are scattered here as I can't remember everything she said, but I did force myself to remember this because I thought it was simple yet profound: "When you give, you give yourself everything; when you withhold you withhold everything from yourself." Sometimes I'm hard on myself and it makes me think of that saying 'you get in your own way' or something like that and this helps me simplify why that not the best way. Not sure if this concept will make since to everyone else the same way it does to me in this moment (my brain is a little cloudy from studying/being tired)...but I'm sure it will become even clearer to me over time.

It takes a minute to absorb: "When you give, you give yourself everything; when you withhold you withhold everything from yourself."

This week I'm already starting to feel the stress and pressure, but I need to affirm to myself that I can do this everyday, find at least 5 min to clear my mind and meditate, and not give in to distractions-which are everywhere. So, I may not post again til the end of the week depending on how things go.

Thanks to all.