Day 13............A week for Thanks.

Not only is it Thanksgiving this week, but I feel it is time for me to appreciate and give thanks for my life. I am really finding my journey to be plentiful and starting to show true results. I am getting more positive energy around me, and using it to stay positive myself. I am sticking up for myself and also getting the backbone I have lost throughout my struggles. I am continuing to be a good person and give love and help to others. I still want to be the good energetic person that gives to people and helps those I love and strangers whenever I can. I truly love to give and help because I feel people do not receive enough of that in their lives. People are so quick to say what can you do for me? I try and live the golden rule. I really do think treat others the way you want to be treated. This does not always apply with people I have come across. Though I am not going to stop being a good person because of misfortunes in my life. But I will find my voice and backbone and stand up for myself and what I believe in. I will no longer stay quiet and not speak up for myself. I am thankful that I am becoming a stronger person and capable and proud to be the person I am and to own my life. I will continue to stand up for my beliefs and the way I want my life to be. I am thankful for my voice.

I am also very thankful for Dana. He came into my life unexpected and I never expected my desire for him as just a distraction to grow into a great love and respect. Dana is a retreat that I have been able to use whenever I felt this past year that I was breaking down. He has made me see things I never wanted to see or didn't think I was capable of seeing. Dana gave me my sanity back. He made me stand on my own two feet. Dana gives me strength everyday to get through the trials and tribulations of life. I have discovered my own strength and abilities to get through difficult situations without feeling like my life was falling apart. I love Dana the way I never thought I could. He has made me think of others instead of myself. I have lived so long in a relationship I gave little to because I was selfish and only worried about myself and what I needed. It is not fair and I wish I could make Clinton (who I was with for 5 years and took for granted) know that I did love him and probably always will. Dana made this a reality that I treated my relationship with Clinton with little respect and just expected Clinton to take it and give me everything of himself. I have gone from feeling owed to giving my love, attention, respect, and time to those I love and care about. I cannot go back in time and have Clinton receive all of these things but, I can try and stay a good positive retreat to him in his life now. A friend and retreat for him to get the things I neglected him for the past couple years. Dana has made all of this possible. He has gotten me out of the darkness. He has helped me retrieve my voice. Dana has given me strength to go for what I want. I have lost myself for a few years now and Dana made me get myself back. He would not give in to me the way others have and provided me with an excuse. He gave me a shoulder to cry on but then made me think about the situation and how I was going to get past it. That everything isn't that serious. That life goes on and it can be great. We all come across hard times but, there are always sunny days and great things ahead. Dana has made me find my maternal side. I have discovered how great it feels to be a caregiver. Dana makes me want to take care of myself and him. I am rediscovering myself through his eyes and a different perspective. Dana has revived me and for that, I am thankful.

Thanks also goes to my ability for creativity, innovation, conceptual thinking, and artistic talent. I have been ignoring my passions until now and I am thankful I have the talents to bring myself up and create my future the way I want it to be. I am becoming the artist, designer, thinker, and innovator I have always wanted to be and known I have been capable of becoming. I have great talent and ability that I have been blessed with. I appreciate my talents and abilities everyday. I have to remember that I am unique and God has given me his talents to create, imagine, express, and invent alongside my gift of the arts. I have a great complex mind that I have to use more and hone in my skills. I have neglected them so long that I forgot how great and wonderful it is to be given these talents. I am proud of myself and give thanks for everything I am capable of creating. And I will continue to receive chances and work to advance myself and talents with learning, practice, and doing.

My thanks finally ends with myself. I am thankful to myself for holding my life together. For getting the help I have ignored to get for so long. To opening myself up again and allowing myself to love and be loved. I thank myself for standing up for myself and others. I am thankful I am kind, giving, and loving. I love with my whole self and wouldn't want it any other way. I thank myself for letting go of the hate. Becoming a better person. I thank that I was strong enough to get through this past year. I have gotten through a difficult struggle with myself, my love, my career, and my life and health. I have finally realized life and gotten a path that cleared my mind and given me the ability to get well. I am thankful for my doctors and therapist and the ability to understand my struggles with my disease and taking responsibility for my actions and my feelings. I am capable of having a normal and prosperous life now. I am happy and know I can stay happy without bringing myself down anymore. I am thankful for being able to love myself and put myself first in getting my health and life in the right direction. I have built my life up and will continue to.

I will be successful and thank myself for the ability to do so. I am thankful for success in every aspect I have received in life. I am receiving everything I have set out for myself and for that I am thankful.

I am happy and thankful.
I am successful and thankful
I am giving and thankful
I am healthy and thankful
I am wealthy and thankful
I have new work and thankful
I have money for my wants and thankful
I have creativity and thankful
I have ability to create and thankful
I am loved and thankful
Dana loves me and thankful
I love Dana and thankful
I am wanted and thankful
I am needed and thankful
I talented and thankful
I am appreciated and thankful
I get to travel and thankful
I am mentally stable and thankful
The CAVS win the championship and thankful
I go to Europe with Dana and thankful
I am married and thankful
I am fulfilled and thankful

I have all of you and THANKFUL

LOVE