I love having those realizations that just make everything seem so much clearer than it was before. I’ve been so focused on a number of situations to resolve, I think I’ve actually held myself in this state of waiting my manifesting the lack of resolution. The first thing that has been on my plate for years now is a situation where I’m suing someone who really did me wrong. I’m 4 and a half years into this lawsuit which I thought would conclude last month and it didn’t. I felt like we were so close but again, the whole situation is back in limbo and I have no idea when the conclusion of the trail will occur. In addition to that and perhaps as a result, we’ve been having one financial hardship after another. Since my husband and I have had all of these subsequent difficulties we’ve jumped around as far as what we’re doing for a living and it's been really stressful. The economy played it's part too.
I’m really glad that we’ve had this tumultuous journey because it’s lead me to really see what’s important and what I’d really like to be doing. The first thing that seemed to happen as I made my intentions clear about my 100 day challenge is that I began to feel like I had more time to focus on some projects that had been on the back burner for some time. What was strange about this was that I didn’t create more time for myself or anything… it just appeared and I was able to start being productive again. One of the things that I could focus on is a patent that I've been preparing and will now file tomorrow on an invention that I came up with about 4 and a half year ago. The other is a book that I’ve been writing but stopped writing about 4 and a half years ago. It’s taken a long time, but I’m writing again and it feels great!
I think I’ve just let myself have this desperate feeling of treading water for all this time, not because I really needed to but because I attracted that into my life based on what I believed needed to happen as a result of this lawsuit. The thing is, the lawsuit doesn’t matter. I do see it eventually resolving in the most favorable way possible but my life will go on as if it's a done deal, as if it just doesn’t matter anymore. The life I'm creating is not dependent on it so I don't need to tread water. You have no idea how freeing it is to me to tell you that this thing that’s been having a negative impact for so long doesn’t matter. I no longer care much for how it’s going to end because I know that I’m going to manifest the life that I’ve been dreaming about regardless of what happens. I made a mountain out of a mole hill; now it's a mole hill again - YAY. I'm so thankful for that!