I had a wonderful run on the beach last night after a very long and tiring day at work. my body wanted to run and run and not stop. it felt great. Something about running with my barefeet hitting the wet sand, and my body is warmed from the exercise so i dont feel cold, the stars above me, my little dog running with me..running is what humans have been doing since we got here i guess, one thig i can do with my energy is feel that feeling of wanting to escape and leave my situation, the running on the beach can tame that, bring me in touch with my humanness, my timelessness, back in to my body, and release the day. I am looking forward to a relaxed a calm few days with the holidays coming. The holidays can feel hard for me as I am sure they feel for many people. working in the medical field i am reminded on the reality of the day, and its easier for me to not gte stuck in old patterns that tell me that everyone else is having a great holiday with loving people around them. I see now that people come in different ways, and so do families and sometimes traditions are nice and sometimes they aren't but regardless this is the season that we are in and I have been intending to give as much love to myself and those around me as i can, while being mindful that i need to pay special attention to how i am feeling as that will guide my choices. so far so good!! I have made some relaxing xmas plans, and I will have plenty of time to relax and take care of myself. I am so thankful for that. new years is really what i am waiting for as some good friends and i have some great plans that I am looking forward too. I am SOOO thankful for everything that this last year has brought me. I again, think about where I was when i started season 1..omg I have crossed worlds since then. I am the most thankful for my hearts healing and the will to heal from the body and the soul. I am growing closer and closer in alignment with the most true and deepest parts of myself. Sometimes i get frustrated because i want paradise NOW! and in so many way i have got it now already, but i also embrace patience as i know i didn’t come down my road in a day, and healing it may take time, focus and love, compassion to really get in there and heal. I am ok with that! I am thankful that I am be mindful during this process. I feel that I am sooo far on my path, but i look up at my destination and want to cry because i am not there yet, THEN i look back at where I have been and EVERYTHING that I have crossed, triumphed over, battles I have won and defeated many energies that taught me many have built up a nice pace and i am excited and motivated to embrace and continue this journey while really making the most of each lesson and each moment. Christmas reminds me of a lot of things that hurt me, but i would not have it any other way. what a wonderful opportunity to heal and grow in the safe place that I am in now, sharing my journey with all of you. and allowing myself to open up those deepest levels of my slef for reprogramming...creating new memories, here and now. I intend to stay present with myself, to keep myself safe,to give my body and mind what i need. to maintain balance and gratitude, and to open my heart to the abundance of the universe, that is how i celebrate jesus's birthday. to find his compassion in my heart and shine it in towards myself at each cell and shine it out to the world to each heart.