Day 32 - Being honest about/knowing what I really want

No doubt most if not all of you on here will have heard things said along the lines of 'You must decide what you want. Don't focus on what you don't want' and all that jazz.

Certainly people say these things when mentioning about relationships. The problem I have though, is KNOWING what I really want, and sometimes it's easier to focus on what I don't want. I came to the realisation about two and a half years ago that I probably didn't want to have children, for various reasons, which has caused some internal conflict which there is no need to elaborate on. But I don't find babies or young children particularly cute and bringing up a child would be something I would find very stressful. I much prefer animals - particularly cats although I'm starting to like dogs more too. I now think .. how am I going to find a woman who feels the same way as me .. since so many people seem to want children (not just women, I might add)? And what qualities do I actually want in a woman? It's hard to know sometimes.

Also, I have said that I want to travel. But it's hard to say whether I REALLY want to travel the world. And certainly hard to say how much time I would like to spend travelling. Sometimes I might feel really enthusiastic about it and sometimes I feel that it would be too hard and would be too much hassle etc.

It seems that one part of me wants something and another doesn't .. and sometimes it's hard to work out whether it's my ego or my soul talking.

Is there really a perfect plan/purpose for our lives, or do we have to work things out along the way?

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Comment by Thx 4 ur support in my journies! on December 2, 2012 at 8:33pm: Raizel is right, it is called contrasting. Awsome stuff! Those series are soooo helpful. And yes, I think there is some sort of plan or purpose for our lives (e.g. prenatal contracts, chosing our parents and sometimes even our spouses) - but we do also have to work things out along the way. The hard thing for me is knowing what was prenatal and what is pure my free will? And can I chose to tear the contract apart, and create my own?:)

Comment by Andy B on December 2, 2012 at 1:02pm: cool, sounds a good thing to do - I know I have watched a little bit of Lilou's videos with Michael Losier, but not the whole series.

Comment by Raizel on December 2, 2012 at 12:45pm: Have you watched Lilou's Deliberate Attraction Series with Michael Losier, or read something by him? He has this straightforward process of getting really clear on what you want by listing everything you don't want and crossing those things out as you create statements that are the exact opposite. I've found that quite helpful.

My best friend feels the same way about children by the way. I think she's more likely to have 5 dogs then to have even one child. She actually finds kids the very opposite of cute, but gets very maternal around puppies :D