The 100 Day Reality Challenge

Day 65 - 100 Day Reality Challenge

My feelings of frustration are super high right now.

I'm feeling extremely agitated and frustrated at lack of progress. My book landing page mock up just came through and it is awful, I haven't heard back from the cover designer for way too long, it seems that even the slightest changes are taking weeks to get done, the magazine seems to be in a bit of limbo as I wait for the design layout to be completed - again very long delays in getting this sorted. The editor is ahead of schedule and doing an awesome job so that is something at least!

The longer this stuff takes the further it feels from actually happening and I think that is where the anxiety is coming from, feeling as though it is never going to happen or that things are not going to work out as I had hoped they would.

I came home from Chris's this morning after being away for 3 nights and I think that the travel backwards and forwards, living out of a suitcase, being away from home, my routine and the kids got to me (on top of my work stuff) and we ended up having a stupid argument (that I started)  and I left angry and now we won't see each other again for days.

The argument was nothing serious (a reaction to something I don't handle well as a hangover from my childhood) and we will be fine but another reason I need to slow down and once again become grounded in my home, my work, my routine and what I am trying to achieve.

I'm always a bit of a shocker during the holidays, I start to become restless and anxious over things that usually don't bother me and I seem to be bouncing off the walls.

I think I am always caught between knowing I should be taking a break and not wanting to waste time knowing I have the extra hours up my sleeve because I'm not teaching classes. I end up stuck, spinning my wheels and frustrated.

I've been around long enough to know that this is the typical breakdown before a breakthrough so I'm optimistic this will pass.

As soon as I kick off classes again tomorrow I'll once again be grounded in my martial art and I know this will flow into everything else.

Today I'm going to write out my frustrations in my journal and take a mental holiday!!

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Comment by Michelle on April 8, 2013 at 7:43pm

Hey Michelle, I know exactly how you are feeling! I, too am feeling very anxious and frustrated and feel that it is taking too long for things to happen.  Just when I feel like I am making progress, something pushes me back and the feelings of doubt start to kick in.  I have a HUGE admiration for you and everything you are doing and stand for!  I know this will pass for you...as you always say to me, keep pushing through! xxx

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