Today was a fairly good day today but I made a new realisation. When i get my lunch ready - don't munch on anything during prep or when i'm cleaning up. just drink a glass of water.
I've been really really tired today as my little one decided to wake up at 5am. so, it's been pretty full on. By the time i got to lunch, i was really really hungry. we'd just come back home and I hadn't had my water properly. instead of heading for the water while i prepare as i was feeling thirsty, i went to the fridge instead and pulled out a few things to nibble on. It was all done in auto-pilot mode so i was in the thick of it before i knew what i was doing. So then i had my lunch and it didn't feel enough. instead of finishing lunch off with more water, i ended up going to the cupboard. i had a few things. i did pull myself out of it and told myself no and did some self talk. i had water and chewing gum and it took a while but i got my hydration back up and the food cravings were gone. so i'm proud i did help myself out but it did leave me a little worried about what i'd done too. i am not that person anymore. i am not the person that struggles. i just get myself hydrated. this is the new me. i'm already like that.
i was proud that i didn't have any sweets. my cravings definitely went to chocolates very badly but i didn't have them. i talked myself out of it every time.
we just had dinner and i was craving for more stuff afterwards and i almost had some too. i didn't and i'm proud. i kept going to water. i'm very proud.
it's now obvious to me that i'm going through sugar craving withdrawals. it's funny how i didn't realise it before. oh well, time to really focus on the water consumption to wash away those cravings.
it was an exercise free day (which was a good thing because i was soooo tired). i've been watching my water consumption but my internal dialogue was a little bit weak...
tomorrow is going to be an interesting day. It's exercise day but a friend is dropping off 2 of her kids so everything is going to be really tight. i want to do my run during the day before the kids come (with a quick shower). i also wanted to colour my hair as i'm going away on the weekend (want to look fresh). i really need to do it tomorrow if i'm going to do it otherwise i won't get it all done. so it's going to be rush rush rush but i'll be focused. i'm going to watch my water consumption and talk to msyelf a lot. i'm the best friend i could ever have :)
it's going to work out and sort out.
ok hubby gratitude time, (i'm feeling a little weird at the moment because my hubby is going OS on sat (which is why i'm going to spend time in another state with some friends). i always get like this :/)
- i'm grateful he came in the morning into my little one's room when i was changing her, after she woke up. he was playful and it really made her morning. it was lovely. he's at a conference at the moment so i know it made it harder for him to get ready in time but he did it.
- i'm grateful he's open to what i say. i know our parenting styles are different and i'm very hands on and very much 'about the child's experience'. it must be odd for him when i come up with 'she's doing this and i've been doing that etc' but he's always been very open. he doesn't make me feel weird. he's good.
- i'm grateful he somehow makes us work. we're both very different people and i really try too but i have my moments when i get grumpy (usually when i'm hormonal as well), but somehow he manages not to do that. he does time out during weekends and does alone things to help him unwind. he makes us work.
- i'm grateful that no matter what i dish out, he always wants me. he wants our relationship. he wants our marriage. he wants our family. that's so wonderful and special. i've never questioned his desire for our family and me. that's really amazing.
- i'm grateful he never pressures me. we want another child but there's no pressure. i'm the primary carer for our little one but there's no pressure. i'm the day to day house cleaner / keeper but there's no pressure. he never makes comments about weight or look or anything like that. he's always affectionate with me and it's enough. he never checks out other women when i'm around and he never comments about other women. he never makes me feel insecure. i am so grateful i have that.
- i'm grateful he's so thoughtful. he told me that he wants to mow the lawn tomorrow. it's been raining for a couple of days in a row and i don't know if the weather is clearing up. he's doing it because this is his way of of showing how he cares for us.
- i'm grateful he was affectionate today. he knows i get funny and distant (and it's not in a good way). still, he looked past that and was affectionate. he knows i need those cuddles and kisses. he's so lovely.
- i'm grateful i have him
- i'm grateful it's a short trip .... it could always be much worse.