Season 2 - Day 3 - Past conditioning...don't you just love it

I had such a great time at the party last night! I even got a little emotional in the bathroom because I was so happy to be surrounded with my favourite kind of people!

Something happened though that I want to talk about. I want to be able to share everything on these blogs. Not just the positive so everyone can learn from my experience. 

At the end of the party one of my friends whom I haven't seen in a long time went in to hug me. I gave him a hug and afterwards he said "You don't like hugs do you?" And I was like "what do you mean?" "Of course I do!" and he basically confessed that he always felt that I seemed like I didn't like to hug people. 

It's weird because I do! There are plenty of times when I would see someone I know and immediately go for the hug. But then I started thinking....

When I was little, my mom used to "make me" hug people who I just met out of politeness. And that's what I do now! 

A hug for me isn't out of love, it's out of politeness. How messed is that? And my friend (who I love very much for being honest with me) helped me realize that. Thank you thank you thank you!

I still have that in me. Whenever I see someone I know I have that reflex that was built into me by my mom and it comes across as fake even though I think in my mind that it's real. 

I love it when I uncover things like this because it makes me much more AWARE and CONSCIOUS of my past conditioning. Has anyone made any discoveries lately? 

Grateful today for:

-Working out

-Seeing my friends! and lunch!

-Shopping day

-My beautiful apartment

-Amazing weather!