Warning if your down or things are not going well with you then please do not read this, I have to get it off my chest or else something will happen.
Hmm I'm not really sure where to start this from but let me tell you something about my current situation, I have been trying to get done with some exams for few years now its all my fault I'm not blaming anyone for what I'm in right now at alll.
I have been sponsor by an institute that pays for my expenses without this I wouldn't be able to continue living comfortably, in the past I was able to save some money that if this sponsorship (its similar to having a scholarship) got cut off I will be able to manage my self with the savings for few months, last year they asked me when am I going to be done with my exams, I replied August 2011! Now I'm taking classes that my sponsor wouldn't pay for so I'm paying with whatever extra money I have and didn't show them any evaluations because I'm scared that they will cut me off since its not approved classes to take by my sponsor at all but I need it for my own reasons( that is way too personal for me to share).
For the first time since I was born mom calls me to ask me to send money for my brother who is overseas at the moment, she was appologizing about it which really irritated me because if anything I love it when I can help my own family and contribute in any way shape or form.
Now that was a big chunck of my saving that wouldve lasted me a month and a half, then my friend( we use to roommate back in undergrad then later in grad school) calls me from europe telling me that things r not good with her either and this exam is not getting done either! I told her we need to meet up AFTER our exam, long story short she end up here ( I love having her here its just wrong very wrong timing for me) just to have to deal with my roommates about having someone over since we don't do visitors and ppl over so now they want to charge her $30 a night, she is here for 12 days so guess what! I felt soo embaressed asking her for the money its coming out of my own pocket (she doesn't even know) so that my friends is another $360 out!
I took once some money from a friend n forgot about it, its just little under a grand and now they need it back that's ALSO from my savings.
The other night we decided we want to go watch a movie, really late at night and thought taking the car will make it quick and painless since I'm trying soooo hard to squeez in some studying and some gym time while she is here, just to get back n not find my car! My heart just sank! I thought it was stolen just to find out that it got towed so I end up paying $185 and still have to pay my parking ticket which is another sum of money! I feel like crying, I have been not doing much with her since I thought that I made it clear to her that I'm short in time and in money lately so I have been doing tourist things with her today and will do that again tomorrow and now my friends my savings have been cleared!! I'm soo mad at my self, why didn't I say no to her when she said she wanted to come! I'm in the bus next to her now and I feel like I need to cry and I need a cig ( I quit for 2 weeks) but now all I can think about is getting home get in the shower then go for a drive I need to clear my head