OK... its been a rough weekend and I am glad it is over. One kid home from school today after an asthma attack, but he's feeling much better now. Hasn't had one in at least 6 months, but I guess he's back on his meds again.
I did a couple things this weekend to work toward manifesting the life I want. Journaling by hand and trying to use it to get into alignment with my higher self went well. Even went virutal shopping for a while and found some joy in that as well.
I do have a couple of things I'm confused about. For example, I know that other people can not keep me from getting what I have manifested. But how does it work when a spouse seems to be stuck? He has been unemployed since mid August, and was the sole breadwinner. At first we both were just going with the flow, expecting a new job to come (as a few former business associates had said they would help him out). But as time moved on we have seen nothing. Now we are seeing more and more evidence of the negative coming and while I try to roll with it and find the positives, he seems to be focusing on the "what is" and I know that just brings more of the lack. I am not sure how I can manifest positive, when he seems to be drawing the opposite.
I need to start working small again so that I can start seeing evidence of positive things. Lately I've seen so much contrast, no matter what I do, that its hard to see the good coming sometimes.
Enough whining... Off to focus and see some positives.
***************Edited to add :)
I sat in quiet meditation (well, as quiet as it can get with my 4 year old who is still waiting to go to school and my 8 year old home sick) looking for appreciation and a few things came up and smacked me.
1. A few weeks ago there were troubles with the brakes on my van and they actually caught fire one day. I hadn't driven it since, thinking it needs repairs that I can not afford at this time. As the fuel level in the truck went down, and we haven't the funds to fill it, I had said, "wouldn't it be nice if the van could be used safely again?" Because I knew it had at least half a tank of gas in it. I brushed it off and forgot about it, but my husband drove it yesterday and there were no problems with it at all. The brakes didn't even smell the way they had before.
2. In doing the laundry this weekend I did see a lot of evidence of financial abundance. Mostly in the form of loose change, but a couple of dollars as well. Its just little bits for now, but hints of things to come.
Back to looking for the small stuff... because sometimes an abundance of the little good things can counteract the worst of the big things.