hello everybody. happy Easter to you!
As for my recent thoughts... Trying to find the meaning of life. For the past few years i have just lived in a rush. Studying all the time, doing sports, studying, going out, studying, sleeping, doing sports. Really no time to think about anything. Being single, trying to love single life, living for myself, accepting myself, getting to know myself.
But now im just thinking, like whats the purpose of living all for yourself? Really, the purpose? if i die, my family would cry a while, but then, my parents have each other, my siblings have their families, my friends would easily live without me, so nobody would miss me. its not like im very sad about that, its just how it is. so why should i live, if im not giving any benefit to anybody. now im thinking that travelling is great, but it has no purpose if you have no one to share it with. what is the purpose of being single, living for myself, traveling, working, hanging out? who cares in the end? like who gives a fuck about my great single life? ithink nobody. i dont think it is really worth living a life like that.
maybe somebody would say that i will meet a special someone, have family and kinds and life will have a meaning. but sometimes i think, maybe the plans and thoughts i had when little wont come true. maybe i wont get married and wont have children? it is possible. and then my life wont have a purpose?
i agree, that love is the real meaning. i love my family, my parents also love me. but that should come as a default setting. it sometimes doesn't, but c'mon, kids are meant to fly away from their parents nest and build their own lives, not manage problems they had with parents or childhood all their lives. meeting someone out of your family and falling in love, loving and accepting is the real thing. but maybe im not built for that. why? that is another blog post, i doubt someone would like to read that much.
so anyway, who read all this, i would be happy just to hear any thoughts on this topic and topics around this.