No doubt most if not all of you on here will have heard things said along the lines of 'You must decide what you want. Don't focus on what you don't want' and all that jazz.
Certainly people say these things when mentioning about relationships. The problem I have though, is KNOWING what I really want, and sometimes it's easier to focus on what I don't want. I came to the realisation about two and a half years ago that I probably didn't want to have children, for various reasons, which has caused some internal conflict which there is no need to elaborate on. But I don't find babies or young children particularly cute and bringing up a child would be something I would find very stressful. I much prefer animals - particularly cats although I'm starting to like dogs more too. I now think .. how am I going to find a woman who feels the same way as me .. since so many people seem to want children (not just women, I might add)? And what qualities do I actually want in a woman? It's hard to know sometimes.
Also, I have said that I want to travel. But it's hard to say whether I REALLY want to travel the world. And certainly hard to say how much time I would like to spend travelling. Sometimes I might feel really enthusiastic about it and sometimes I feel that it would be too hard and would be too much hassle etc.
It seems that one part of me wants something and another doesn't .. and sometimes it's hard to work out whether it's my ego or my soul talking.
Is there really a perfect plan/purpose for our lives, or do we have to work things out along the way?