I've been thinking a lot about the law of attraction and my thoughts creating circumstances vs destiny and what is out of my control. Not trying to think or rationalize it so much is likely the thing to do, but alas I'm not there yet. I was chatting with a friend a couple weeks ago whose spriritual knowledge I like to soak up. He believes we chose who are parents are going to be so that we can have the experiences we need, in order to heal whatever energy stuff needs to be healed. I had what most would consider some difficult childhood experiences involving a wonderful and loving, but often depressed and suicidal mother who ultimately took her own life when I was 16. I know taking responsibility for the life you create does not involve blame or guilt but once I started learning about the law of attraction I started wondering how much of my childhood I created. Or was it destined to happen like my friend said. Since the term is co-creating, it's clear that I am working with god to make this all happen but I'm really uncertain how much of this is of my doing and how much would have happened anyway regardless of my conscious thoughts. And subconscious thoughts are a whole other thing... Anyway, my friend said stop thinking so much and realize that it's all about how you feel in every moment, how you react to situations and how grateful and compassionate you are. I know I'm tyring to polarize things too much and that it's not me versus god. I am god. But that knowing doesn't make things much clearer for me. As I write this I did a google search on this topic to see what came up. I found this article which exactly describes my predicament: http://robertfagan.com/golf/uncategorized/926/destiny-versus-self-e.... He quotes Eat, Pray, Love and I remembered why I liked, most, of that book so much.
“Destiny is a play between divine grace and willful self effort. Half of it you have no control over, half of it is absolutely in your hands and your actions will show measurable consequence. Man is neither a puppet of the Gods nor is he entirely the captain of his own destiny. He is a little of both. We gallop through our lives like circus performers balancing the two speeding side-by-side horses. One foot is on the horse called “Faith,” the other on the horse called “Free will” and the question you have to ask every day is which horse is which, which horse do I need to stop worrying about because it’s not under my control and which do I need to steer with concentrated effort?”
I guess if I respond to everything with love and gratitude, even the stuff that is uncomfortable, then things will more easily flow and I will know the choices I need to make to head in the direction of my dreams and my destiny. ???